Thursday, October 20, 2005

Well, Bill Clinton just ended his tour of Canada and I gotta say, the Canadians were lovin' the Billster. I love Clinton. He was a hot President who should have stayed in office. Seriously, he was impeached for getting a hummer. I think it goes without saying that Bush has done much, much worse.

Some highlights from Clinton's speech in Toronto, via

Former U.S. president Bill Clinton said he sympathized with Canada's position in the long-standing softwood lumber dispute and expressed support for Prime Minister Paul Martin's tough stand on the issue.

"In view of the American position, I don't see how your prime minister can be anything but really publicly very tough on this. I don't think he's got an option," Clinton said, implicitly criticizing Washington's refusal to abide by a NAFTA ruling.
Addressing a sold-out crowd of nearly 4,000 in London, Ont., Clinton received a standing ovation after holding forth on multilateralism, globalization, global warming, AIDS, the tsunami and hurricane relief, his wife's political career, his differences with President George W. Bush and his affection for Bush's father.

But the former president's strongest comments were reserved for the current Canada-U.S. dispute over softwood lumber.
"You've lost some jobs out of this, and a fair amount of money, a few billion dollars," he added.
"If I were the Canadian prime minister, that's what I'd say."

Bill Clinton, you're hot and Canada loves a good rim job just as much as you. We love you!

Here are some cheesy Clinton jokes for your gander:

What does Bill say to Hillary after sex? --I'll be home in twenty minutes.
Why does Bill Clinton wear underwear? --To keep his ankles warm.
Realization of from another White House intern . . . --And all that time I thought that humming was the shredder!
Why was Monica Lewinsky in the White House after hours? --Clinton was showing her the proper way to take "dic"tation.
What was President Clinton's explanation for having oral sex with Monica Lewinsky? --"They told me she was the "head" intern!"
What's the recipe for Clinton stew? --A small weenie in hot water.
What do Monica and Bill Clinon have most in common? --They're both going down.
Someone ask Clinton if he was going back to Arkansas after this is all over. --He said he thought he would stay in D.C. and poke around for a while.
Why does Bill drink so much coffee? --He is required to "stay up" for many hours to satisfy the needs of his staff.
How did Clinton exercise his position as Commander-in-Chief? --By barking out orders . . . like "Get Under the Desk!"
Don't feel sorry for Monica...... --She'll be back "on her knees" in no time!
Why did Bill get into this problem? --He didn't know that harass was one word.
Clinton Presidential Anthem -- --Kneel to the Chief
What's the difference between Watergate and Zippergate? --At least this time, there's no doubt about the identity of "Deep Throat."
Why did Monica Lewinsky accept an offer to work on the White House staff? --She didn't understand know what STAFF he really meant.
Who's going to score first in the Super Bowl? --The Denver Broncos or the Green Bay Packers? Bill Clinton
What's Hillary's new nickname for Bill's penis? --"The Titanic" - because over 1500 interns went down on it.
What is Clinton's new Secret Service Code Name? --Unibanger.
How does Hillary feel? --She may be the FIRST LADY, but she won't be the LAST
What advice did Yasar Arafat give President Clinton in their meeting on January 22, 1998? --"Bill....Goats don't talk!!"


Blogger GetFlix said...

Yeah, the whole thing seemed like a bad joke when it was happening. A huge waste of taxpayer's money.

He made it worse with his denial. I would've just told everyone to fuck-off!

And they might have considered getting a room. We could have avoided the "Oral" Office jokes.

10:08 AM  
Blogger Sarah said...

lol yes, discreet isn't one of his adjectives. But getting a blow job at work just seems far less dramatic now, post 9/11 doesn't it? Something for us to think about I guess...

11:20 AM  
Blogger Michael K said...

OMG I miss those days. Life was so much simpler then.... Monica was just a girl and I was just a boy..ugh..

12:52 PM  
Blogger said...

Well you might get another Bill fix if Hillary is elected president. She may as well be elected, she already has 8 years experience of running the country!


Sarah, can I link you on my blog?

1:17 PM  
Blogger Sarah said...

brenda totally i'd love it! I need to get myself a bit more literate in how to do things on my blog...i'll figure it out and link all you hot sluts! :)

4:03 PM  
Anonymous Hottie from Texas said...

Clinton wasn't impeached. The man is a liberal idiot or at least way too much into marxism. He did not take his presidentcy seriously and should have never been a president of the US. He didn't even pass his FBI check. So much for thinking "Bush has done much, much worse." As for his looks. He is soooo ugly and lazy looking it makes me sick. Gross I would never suck something that ugly.

7:55 PM  

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